Attracting the Person You Want

Attracting the Person You Want

Most single women I know have an expectation for the kind of man they want, but they keep attracting the type of man they don’t want. The law of attraction is real, and what you put out in the world, you get back. So instead of complaining about the men (sorry ladies, there will always be dumb-ass men in the world) they attract, start focusing on being the woman your dream guy would be attracted to!

In my late twenties it seemed that all my friends were married. I remember being so sad “the one” was no where to be seen. My pastor tried to console me by saying, ‘The only thing worse than being single and wanting to be married, is wanting to be single when you are married.” Yes, good insight, but I was still lonely, so it didn’t help much.

Meeting my Bride

I went to a pub one night  and met up with some friends. Through mutual friends, I met Amanda, the woman I now call my bride. As we sat at the bar and talked, I remember thinking how incredible this woman was. The story is a little longer, but here is the jest. In the car on the way home, I told my friend Will I wanted to marry a woman just like Amanda. After an uncomfortably long silence, he told me that wouldn’t happen, not in a million years. He then made a great case for why I would not marry a woman like the woman I just met. First off, I didn’t have a job. Second, I didn’t have a degree. Third, I couldn’t afford to take her out. Fourth…I stopped him after the third.

I knew what I had to do. I needed to become the man a woman like that would want. Cut to 2 years later, I had become all the things I needed to become in order to attract a woman like that woman in the bar.

When I was done, there was one thing thing that was totally obvious to me: this woman would not want me! That was a huge realization for me. I was setting myself up for instant failure because I had forgotten the most important part of the relationship equation: being “The One” for the person I wanted!

I went to work on myself, focusing on becoming the kind of man my dream woman is dreaming of. A few years later, as fate would have it, I met Amanda again and I was a WAY better version of myself. We got to talking, had a good time, and got married. Lots of other stuff happened during that time, but in the end, what is important is that after I decided to stop looking at my surroundings, and instead focus on myself, things worked out. Look inward, and your outward will blossom.

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