empowering athletes to express identity 🧦 🧦
Kids want to be different, just like everyone else. The picture above was taken on picture day, immediately after taking the "official picture.” The Funny thing is, we spent 35 minutes waiting for the official pictures. When invited to have dinner with the different families after the season washer, this is the picture I saw on their refrigerators. This picture took 10 seconds and better represents who they are than some stuffy, organized team photo.
Notice the socks.
At the beginning of the season, after the first week of practice, I start our training with an activity I call “The Best Teammate.
The girls sit down in a circle. I then ask them to consider what attributes make up a great teammate. These were 6th-grade girls, so it took a while for them to warm up, but it was worth the wait. If a team member had the same trait in mind as another, I encouraged her to think of something else. Once they got going, I had to cut them off, or we would be there all night!
I wrote each attribute down on the edges of the page, then asked them to commit to being these things this year by signing their name. This was also a great time to learn what the attributes they may have never heard of actually meant. Each athlete was eager to sign.
Lastly, we spent a few minutes coming up with a team yell. We would use this for the rest of the season. We were given the mascot "Suns,” so it had to be something that had to do with the sun. After a few minutes, we collaboratively devised "Fun in the Sun.” I wrote that in the middle of the paper, and we practiced. When we were done, this is what we had created:
The next day I bought nine pairs of socks. I looked at the calendar and marked down when picture day was happening. Then, I made sure to give them out at practice and after games so they all had some by the time picture day came. As the days went on, I would call out an athlete for doing something good and reward them with a pair of socks. They were allowed to wear these during games. They would trade pairs and wear different socks on each leg. It became something they all liked forward to. When picture day finally came, the photo above is what we got!
When you do this, you bond your team and create a sense of ownership for your athletes. Also, your athletes give you the qualities you can now hold them accountable to. Creating a shared understanding of terminology and encouraging others to be an ideal teammate creates a great team culture all kids want to be a part of. Catch them being good, reward the behavior, and make great memories.
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It’s the day before pictures, and the girls huddle at the end of practice.
"Great practice, ladies. Emerson, you are getting a lot better at boxing out the shooter on defense, I just want you to know I noticed. Alex, deep breath before the foul shot."
"…and two dribbles!" Alex responds with a smile.
I notice Cameron hunched over as she tries to catch her breath and ask, "Cameron, are you okay?”
"Yes, just super tired."
“If we did one more sprint, who would win?”
“I would!” Cameron shouts. Her teammates jokingly protest.
"Tasha, tell me something you noticed about Caitlyn today."
"She was here before anyone else and shot free throws until practice started."
Caitlyn gets a high-five from a nearby teammate.
"Can anyone tell me which attribute describes her pre-practice routine?" I ask while I hold out the sheet we created weeks before. The team decides "hard-working" best suits her behavior. I reach into my back pocket and hand her some crazy socks. The team cheers, we break, and practice is over.
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The moral of this story is we must remember as youth coaches we are coaching children who play a sport, not athletes who happen to be children. The socks are not what Caitlyn will remember. She will remember that her coach noticed her and made her feel good about her effort, not her performance. Think back to a coach or teacher who made you feel good about yourself. It doesn't take much effort. A $4 pair of socks in exchange for building confidence in a young athlete is more than just a gesture of appreciation; it is an investment in a person.
Remember that not all athletes like to be rewarded in the same way. While some athletes may appreciate public recognition, others may prefer private acknowledgment or a personalized note. Some athletes may value tangible rewards such as gift cards or gear, while others may prefer intangible rewards such as extra playing time or increased responsibilities. Coaches should take the time to get to know their athletes and understand what types of rewards will be most meaningful and motivating to them. By tailoring rewards to individual athletes, coaches can ensure that they reinforce and promote the team's values in a way that resonates with each athlete.
