![rules without relationship breeds rebellion](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677907998-HT628845AHZMFJBV60ML/unsplash-image-RLw-UC03Gwc.jpg)
![a teaching technique for coaches from Mr. Rogers](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677909677-KZVS35VEBFSABOTD5CM2/unsplash-image-mse1vdzZXjA.jpg)
![a small way to make a big difference 📩](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677910320-P34E53JRA1I98P64GKI9/unsplash-image-OQMZwNd3ThU.jpg)
a small way to make a big difference 📩
Remember the last time someone wrote you a hand-written letter? In the story above I recall one of my favorite memories as a high school athlete: getting a handwritten note from my coach.
![spartans and mental toughness](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677911282-DHHS3JLLXKS77XI48IAN/unsplash-image-kGpOdvkvCzY.jpg)
spartans and mental toughness
"How do I get my athletes to be more mentally tough?" This is the most popular question I get from coaches and parents. They want to know how to teach an athlete to "tough it out" or "grind with a smile." I could go on and on, but let's get to the meat of what I want to share—a practical application on learning to be comfortable with being uncomfortable.
![on being late and running laps](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677912745-DPN61FULYQ9TKN296FEY/unsplash-image-52p1K0d0euM.jpg)
on being late and running laps
Remember the last time someone wrote you a hand-written letter? In the story above I recall one of my favorite memories as a high school athlete: getting a handwritten note from my coach.
![no rewards, only consequences](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677913580-VYM3B177YBZKODVMFILH/unsplash-image-MggK54YixfU.jpg)
no rewards, only consequences
Like many elementary and middle school athletes, I had the same coach through different sports a couple of years in a row. My coach was an athletic renaissance man who knew a lot about many things, especially sports. Most of his teachings were through stories that may or may not have been true about his athletic past, and he was a master at using metaphors.
![first speech in front of your new team](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677914480-TCT7JJQMRCBPZSTY6NPJ/unsplash-image-L2gFq37JlsM.jpg)
first speech in front of your new team
Speak from the heart. Let them know you will work hard to make them successful. Remind them they are in charge of their attitude, their effort, and their work ethic. Help them to see that you are their guide, but the season belongs to them. Then shut up and show them you meant what you said.
![on being bigger on the inside](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677915303-F0HCOMCOJEYFFVZVTLT6/unsplash-image-tRvZxKDVM80.jpg)
![on sideline reps](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677916637-FFL3SN48X44B2OD7FG1Y/unsplash-image-fDmpxdV69eA.jpg)
![on the mental game 💪🏆](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677917248-68RE6OQQSQP4JU5O9M4Z/unsplash-image-aCU6AJnT-8g.jpg)
on the mental game 💪🏆
Your Athletes have talent, but can they access that talent consistently? My definition of a mentally tough athlete is one who is “able to access their talent regardless of the situation at the highest level your are capable on a consistent basis.” All coaches agree that the mental aspect of athletics is important, but surprisingly many coaches do not spend time strengthening things like focus and emotional regulation.
![Winning with a Mediocre Team](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677920425-FK1SKZ2NBT9UX1BCFPBN/image-asset.jpeg)
Winning with a Mediocre Team
To find more success in youth sports, simplify your playbook, increase your ability to connect with children, and practice in-game situations. But whatever you do, don’t assume the child has learned how to listen and respond. We are the adults, and we are their models for how to be.
Be a great adult.
![Book List for 2019](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677921248-Q08LJU68SB8H9U187S5W/image-asset.jpeg)
![my senior athlete wants to quit](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677922632-BMU6SUVZ36O3D9GBV6CD/image-asset.jpeg)
my senior athlete wants to quit
You pour into an athlete for years, and then in their last year, they want to quit…
If you coach long enough, this will happen to you. What do you do? I made a short video about it here. It was inspired by a conversation I had this morning with a collegiate college coach about a player on her team that is struggling to be "all in" for her senior year. Click here to check it out. In a nutshell, I told her to give the athlete two options: No, or hell yes. Let me explain…
![Meditation for Athletes](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677924493-UBN2G5W40EBH9I17DZGZ/image-asset.jpeg)
![Activity: Legacy Letters](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677925765-8B7C4QQU9C8RKNFKZGUP/legacy+letters+cartoon.jpeg)
Activity: Legacy Letters
Completing a season in a sport is something most people will remember for the rest of their lives. Like I mentioned before, a great culture is created by coaches, athletes, administrators, and parents who are intentional about the sport experience. Writing a Legacy Letter is an excellent way for an athlete to pass on the lessons and traditions learned while competing in something they love. We all want our seniors to graduate, but the culture and traditions they helped create should not graduate with them.
!["Off-Season" or "Prep-Season"?](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677928316-VFQ46J5RE4EBODNBCB18/image-asset.jpeg)
"Off-Season" or "Prep-Season"?
There is no such thing as an “off-season” when you want to be the best. There is pre-season, in-season, post-season, then prep-season.
![Control What You Can in the Moments You Own](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677928884-8BPS92LP3FVP0D45JDKL/image-asset.jpeg)
Control What You Can in the Moments You Own
No matter the situation, you control your attitude and effort. Do this whenever you feel overwhelmed. Make it a habit to take a beat and breath. Practice positive self-talk and tell yourself what you need to hear to get back out there and perform at your highest ability.
![Motivation Versus Inspiration](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/65292b6b06d20e4a3c9fdb80/1698677930477-63XW0P88B8VB9V47YA25/image-asset.jpeg)
Motivation Versus Inspiration
Coach, your athletes are watching you. Your words are motivational, but your actions are what inspire them. Be intentional about what they see, and leave a legacy mark on their character that transcends performance and the scoreboard.